Canned food OP

"I just realized u need a can opener to open the boyarde hope u can find one sorry" -- text massage

And that's the story of how I ended up walking around campus with a can of Chef Boyardee's Mini ABCs & 123s with meatballs, going door to door begging for a can opener. So much for getting a hot lunch every day. I suppose I shouldn't look at gift donkey in the throat though, it will still be good for later. Despite the fact that its clearly an afternoon snack for kindergarteners, and I won't be getting any younger.

28 hours later...

"CURSE YOU CHEF BOYARDEE!!!"
"WHY MUST IT BE SO DIFFICULT TO GET AT THE YUMMY GOODNESS INSIDE YOUR CANS?!?"
"Y U NO EASY OPEN LID!?!?" 
 *bawls away holding the can up in front of the pagan shrine*

nuclear proliferation is for noobs, real men drink tomato sauce

 So there you have it, my catharsis. I have bared my heart and soul to you. But if you are still left wanting, here's an inspirational doge picture.

Time to go mix ranch dressing and a honey ham sandwich into clam chowder. Pasta man ain't got nothing on me.