Rice Sage: No

It's the thick of summertime, and I'm shivering in my t-shirt and shorts because someone wanted overcompensate on the air conditioning. 
"Why don't you just go outside?" -- you, probably
No no no, are you crazy? I must finish bringing my holy message to the good citizens of the internet! I can't be doing foolish things like going outside, I'll just put a jacket on instead. Ah, speaking of the cold...

"one giant mess" pretty much describes the whole thing

This morning I was subjected to an hour and a half of torment by the whims of some twisted mad scientist. That's right, I had to sit through yet another horrid animated feature of warm blooded creatures attempting to solve their relationship problems through cliche formulas. This is the fifth such installment of Nice Rage, entitled Smash Mouth. I was especially disappointed by the extensive appearance of the respected public figure Neil LameAss Tyson, who apparently agreed to show up to help give the film some scientific credibility despite the fact that it completely disregards pretty much every law of nature ever. He has lost all authority in my eye. 

The motives are extremely contrived and the third parties arbitrarily flip flop sides on a dime as if they were some two bit politicians. If you're going to kick all reason to the curb in favor of story, it should at least be a good story, but it isn't. Now, you might not be as jaded as I am but you will probably recognize at least one of the several generic plot formulas they are following to the letter.

 "But it's just a cartoon, what did you expect from an animated summer blockbuster for kids?" --people who actually understood the past two paragraphs

Well, there is an animated children's blockbuster in theaters now (at the time of this writing) that is actually good. I am of course referring to the Location Ascertainment of Blue Tango Charlie. I don't think I cringed even once at that whereas I was in cringe mode for half of Spice Page. So the real question is, what did I expect from another Mice Cage movie? 

Meh...here is some random stuff to occupy your time. Perhaps it will be more emotionally filling than that overextended music video. If you're into that sort of thing.

http://www.marketwatch.com/story/when-a-two-story-closet-just-isnt-enough-2016-07-30

http://imgur.com/gallery/XURum

A brief brush with mortality

This'll be a little divergence from my usual edgelord trollfest, as I feel I need to get this little story down before I forget.

I could have died last Sunday. Or, the Sunday before last. July 10th, 2016 to be exact.