How about both?

Do you enjoy combining things, just for the sake of combining, like mixing ketchup with mustard, milk with orange juice, ketchup with ice cream sandwiches? Then you've come to the right place! With this guide, I will show you how to achieve combinatorial bliss in 3, count 'em, three easy steps!

Step 1: Pick Two
Imagine two things that you really like. The more different they are, the better. Acquire them in their physical form, if possible. If not, that's okay, this is primarily a mental exercise. Visualize each object in your mind. In this example, I will select Chex Mix and Shrek.

straight from the shadynormal plastic bag

"Wow...It tastes like...Chex Mix!" --friend, while trying out my samples
"What?! No, that's not what I laced it w- never mind." -- me

Step 2: Expand Vocabulary
Now, create a new word using letters from the names of the two things. Try to retain one or two of the syllables from the old names. This word will describe the end result of the fusion. I'll combine Chex and Shrek to create "Shrex".

Step 3: Let Google do the work
This is the most controversial step, so be warned. On your web browser(which you are presumably reading this blog from, unless you are some professional procrastinator), open up your favorite search engine, and go to the image search. You see, search engines possess the magic that will transform your dream of combos into a reality. This is where your newly crafted word(s) come into play. All you have to do is type it in the box and go, like thus:

So for my example, I will look for pictures of...wait...uh...this doesn't seem like such a good idea all of a sudden...I'm not sure why, but I get a really bad feeling from this.
Hold on, I'mma squash this spider. Whomp. Squish. Hah. Now...
What to do, what to do....you know what, I won't let something silly like feelings stop me from getting what I want. I'm gonna DOO EET, I'm gonna click that button and-

April Anniversary

You may be wondering why I didn't post yesterday despite it being April already. That's because yesterday was April Fool's Day, and I know that you would all have expected some gigantic super special awesome hilarious joke if I posted that day. The pressure was simply too much for me to handle. That and the fact that this whole blog is just one big joke. 

April 2nd also happens to be the day that I made the very first post on this blog, exactly 1 year ago in 2013. "Time flies", right? Wrong, every single day I went through since then has seemed like a grueling eternity of drudgery and torment. And it will be the same for next year too. Anyway, I will be celebrating the 1 year anniversary by giving you ever so slightly more insight into my creative process.

You may be wondering what kind of extraordinary man it takes to create such a great blog like this. I can tell you that it took years of training, typing lessons, pun dueling, and other contests of wit just to get to this level of stupidity. While I cannot show you what I look like during the creative process, I can give you a glimpse of another Master at work:

Watch as he deftly carves pointlessness from a block of literary cheesecake that would in any other case be very funny. His haphazard, pluripotent style is so moving, it drives me almost to tears.

There was a big white poster board stand outside today, where people were asked to write in a term to fill in the blank in the statement "I am _____ and proud". I suppose they were trying to promote animal marriage rights or something but that statement is just too vague. There are lots of things you can do and be proud of that I doubt they would endorse. I mean you can basically write stuff like:
"I am chauvinist and proud."
"I am a murderer and proud."
"I am a rapist and proud." 
"I am pedophile and proud."
"I am a coffee drinker and proud." 
"I am Belieber and proud."
                                          -- not me
Or maybe they would endorse it. Let's go find out.